Roots and wings
This is what the Lord says: “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.” –Jeremiah 6:16a (NIV)
My dad recently turned 82. He's a good man. Not perfect, but pretty darn good. I’ve noticed over time that the trajectory of my relationship with God has, in many ways, mirrored my relationship with my father. That isn’t unique. Many of us, for better or worse, tend to see God through the lens of how we perceive our fathers. I used to keep a quote taped to the mirror over my dresser: “A child tends to find a Father in God if he has seen something of God in his father.”
I actually began noticing this as a much younger man, but in more recent times, life has added a couple new chapters to the narrative. I’ll have to watch and see if the situation continues to evolve. So far, I’ve experienced four of them and they’re readily explained in terms of expectations and rules.
Authority figure view – My father set and enforced standards. The rules were communicated; I was expected to follow them, there were consequences when I didn't.
Recognition of intent – Though I didn't always understand or agree with certain of the rules, I realized they were meant for my benefit, and I didn't want to disappoint my father.
Maturity/Understanding – At some point I realized the rules were not arbitrary. Seeing the reasons behind them, I began to buy into their value. (This became more real about the time I started having children of my own!)
Fellowship – The rules are no longer a point of discussion; they've become second nature, part of the identity my father helped form in me. Now I just enjoy spending time with Dad.
A righteous man walks in integrity. Blessed are his children after him. –Proverbs 20:7 (WEB)
It would be a mistake to think I was compliant through all those years and phases. I was strong-willed and hard-headed. (Some would say that hasn’t changed much.) I went through seasons when I was the prodigal son and seasons when I was the judgmental older brother (Luke 15). I’ve been very capable of being both the disrespectful son and the disobedient son (Matthew 21). But as life forced me to acknowledge that my dad was significantly smarter than I'd given him credit for, he allowed me to make my mistakes and learn those lessons in the assurance that I was loved, and always would be, no matter what.
I pray we would take this as an encouragement to finish well, regardless of how far down the path we may be. When I was in my 20’s, preparing to make my mark on the world, my father told me he expected me to build on what I’d learned from him and “do it better than I did”. Inherent in his blessing was permission to keep the parts that were true and right and useful, but never be afraid to learn more, do more, be more – to the glory of The Father. And for that, I am grateful.
Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind. –Ecclesiastes 12:13 (NIV)